The digital world: social media, apps, and the wider internet, has become an inseparable part of our lives. We work, study, communicate, and share experiences through our screens. The virtual space can be a place for connection and self-expression, personal growth, learning, and building new relationships.
However, alongside all the benefits and opportunities, the internet can also be a dangerous place for bullying, violence, and sexual harm. The online environment can provide abusers with relative anonymity and easy access to potential victims, especially children and teenagers.
Online sexual harm can undermine our sense of security and leave us with difficult feelings of confusion, shame, and fear. Unlike physical encounters, online harm happens through screens, which can sometimes make it difficult for us to identify the boundary between a legitimate interaction and exploitation or abuse. This kind of harm can happen gradually, by building an emotional connection or making tempting promises, or it can be an intrusive and aggressive act that occurs without warning.
We might feel helpless against online harm, especially when it comes from people we trust or when we fear exposure. Often, abusers exploit the anonymity of the digital space to obscure responsibility and reduce our ability to react immediately. It is important to remember that sexual harm, even when it happens online, is a form of abuse and violence with real-life consequences.
What is Online Sexual Harm?
Online sexual harm has unique characteristics that can deepen the damage: rapid dissemination: harmful content can spread quickly and widely; difficulty in deletion: it is often hard to completely remove content once it has been uploaded; and difficulty in enforcement: online anonymity makes it hard to identify and catch abusers.
Online sexual harm can take many forms, for example:
- Receiving unwanted sexual messages or explicit images.
- Sextortion – a situation where someone threatens to distribute our intimate photos if we don’t send more materials or comply with their demands.
- Impersonation and exploitation – someone pretending to be someone else to gain our trust and then sexually exploit us.
- Spreading our intimate photos without consent, which can severely damage our sense of security and privacy.
How Can We Identify a Risk of Online Sexual Harm?
There are several signs that should raise a red flag for us:
- An unfamiliar person who contacts us in an intrusive, pressuring way or tries to quickly advance to an intimate conversation.
- Someone who asks us to keep a conversation, a correspondence, or a relationship a secret.
- Pressure to send personal or intimate photos.
- Tempting offers that seem “too good to be true.”
How Can We Protect Ourselves?
To keep ourselves safe online, it’s a good idea to adopt a few important habits:
- Avoid sharing photos or personal information with people we don’t know well.
- Set our social media accounts to private and make sure we control who sees our content.
- Be careful about downloading files or clicking on links that are sent to us.
- Remember that we are not obligated to reply to unwanted messages, and in any case of harassment—block and report.
What to Do If We Have Experienced Harm?
If we have experienced online sexual harm, it’s important to remember that it is not our fault, and also that we do not have to deal with it alone.
Online sexual harm, like any sexual harm, can have consequences in various areas of life. Feelings of anxiety and depression, shame, and self-blame may arise. The harm can lead to social isolation and avoidance of social relationships, and damage to self-image and self-confidence, as well as difficulties in school or at work.
Here are a few steps that can help:
- Save evidence: screenshots of messages, photos, and the sender’s details can help when contacting authorities or professionals.
- Seek help: there are professional resources that can help us deal with the situation, including hotlines, and we can also start by telling someone we trust.
- Share with a loved one: don’t deal with this alone. Emotional support from those around us can help us a lot.
In any case, remember that if we’ve experienced harm, it does not mean there is something wrong with us—the responsibility is always on the abuser.